ANOTHER IDIOT CONSULTANT

posted by James Reel

    The Oregon Symphony is in the hands of a fool named Elaine Calder, whom the Portland Oregonian describes as “a straight-talking Canadian arts consultant who spent the past five years turning around the continent's northernmost professional orchestra, the Edmonton Symphony.” Not only is she stupid; she’s dangerous, because she’s giving bad advice to a troubled orchestra. According to the newspaper article, here’s what Calder identifies as one of the orchestra’s main problems:

    "We do a lot of classical programming." Too much, she means. "At the beginning of the 21st century, you can no longer look at any market as homogenous. You've got to find niche markets, and I don't see too much of that here."
    Edmonton's example is instructive. When the Canadian orchestra played with Christian soft-rock singer Michael W. Smith, people snapped up $250,000 worth of tickets, nearly all by people who had never attended the symphony.
    "There's an audience that is happy to come to symphony concerts if you play their music," Calder says. She mentions the Oregon Symphony's "Gospel Christmas" concert last weekend, which has already sold $20,000 in tickets for next year.
    "What we're seeing is, they'll come if they know the music." Calder is proposing a major shift in programming: Give audiences what they want to hear, not just what the music director thinks they should hear.

    There are so many things wrong with those statements. Let me point out the most obvious: People can already hear “their music” by going to concerts that showcase individual rock musicians and gospel choirs. It isn’t as if they’re deprived. Now, if they have easy access to “their” music the way it’s meant to sound, why would they want to pay at least double the price of a regular ticket to hear “their” music schlocked up with sappy orchestra accompaniments? How can a symphony orchestra justify its existence by being reduced to an inconsequential backup band for pop acts? These are not what Calder calls “symphony concerts,” because no symphonies are involved. A symphony is a composition, not an ensemble; "symphony orchestra" means that the orchestra is a classical band, not a dance combo.
    And if Calder is so interested in “niche audiences,” how can she overlook the fact that the classical audience itself is already niche? How about serving that niche?
    Get this straight, moron consultants: The goal of an orchestra is not to serve pablum to the greatest number of people, competing with myriad other organizations that are equipped to do it better and cheaper. The goal is to excel at a particular kind of music the orchestra is specifically designed to fit, and to serve audiences inclined to give that music a try. Period.
    I can’t wait to see what A.C. Douglas has to say about this.