COYOTE CAROL

posted by James Reel

    A few years ago I heard a pack of coyotes howling on Christmas Eve, and was pleased to think of them as wild carolers, going wash to bosque with their own seasonal greetings. But what, exactly, would coyotes, good pagans all, sing about at this time of year? Here’s what I came up with, sung to the tune of “God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen”:

God bless you, hairy cattlemen,
and hirsute shepherds, too.
More meager would our mealtimes be
Without the likes of you,
Who’ve introduced into our realm
That tempting baa and moo.
Oh, thank goodness for human fools who keep
cattle and sheep.
All we ask is:
Please don’t shoot us from your Jeep.