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Cue Sheet – February 22nd, 2006

DUBIOUS DEFINITIONS

    Composer and sometime critic Ken LaFave has passed along some music definitions you won't find in Grove's. You never know the origins of these things that circulate in cyberspace, but this list has the name Al Heller attached to it:

    Obbligato - being forced to practice
    Con Moto - yeah baby, I have a car
    Allegro - a little car
    Metronome - short, city musician who can fit into a Honda Civic
    Lento - the days leading up to Easto
    Largo - beer brewed in Germany for the Florida Keys
    Piu Animato - clean out the cat's litter box
    Con Spirito - drunk again
    Colla Voce - this shirt is so tight I can't sing
    Improvisation - what you do when the music falls down
    Prelude - warm-up before the clever stuff
    Flats - English apartments
    Chords - things organists play with one finger
    Discords - thing that organists play with two fingers
    Suspended Chords - useful for lynching the vocalist
    Time Signatures - things for drummers to ignore
    Melody - an ancient, now almost extinct art in songwriting
    Klavierstuck - A term used by German furniture movers attempting to get a piano through a narrow doorway
    Music Stand - An intricate device used to hold music. Comes in two sizes - too high or too low - always broken.
    Tonic - A medicinal drink consumed in great quantity before a performance, and in greater quantity afterwards.
    Dominant - What parents must be if they expect their children to practice.
    Concert Hall - A place where large audiences gather, for the sole purpose of removing paper wrappings from candy and gum.
     Soto Voce - singing while drunk
     Agogic - playing high enough on an oboe to make the eyes bulge.
     Cadenza - slapping noise on office furniture
     Fandango - grabbing the pull chain on the ceiling fan
     Prima Volta - jump start with a battery
     Refrain - proper technique for playing bagpipes
     Smorzando - with melted chocolate and marshmallow

    This list lacks one of my favorites, which I will append:
    Minor Second - two oboists playing concert A

quodlibet,

About Cue Sheet

James Reel's cranky consideration of the fine arts and public radio in Tucson and beyond.